SSC '04 "Larrup County Fair" [first/last]
By Rhosymedre
500 words
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Larrup County Fair

Memories of girlhood county fairs flooded Sophie every
August: Corn dogs slathered in mustard; dizzying herself on
the midway scrambler, sleekly brushed cows meekly queuing
to enter the show arena. As a "4-H"er, she'd always entered
some competition. Oatmeal cookies one year, sewing the
next, she'd thrilled to see the blue ribbons attached to
her projects.

Now a ranch wife in another state, Sophie had long ago put
up her 4-H greens. But her competitor's spirit remained
indefatigable. Once again she had entered herself and hubby
Dan in the contest headlining the Larrup County Fair.

Showtime: today, 2:00 p.m. The stands burst with spectators,
including media. Forty couples filed into the well-lit
arena and fanned out to the forty straight-backed chairs
staggered evenly. All faced the judges' panel. Mostly men,
a few women, sat in the chairs, partners standing at their
sides.

Sophie fidgeted nervously until the presiding judge barked:
"Positions!" Dan, wearing their paper entry number 14 over
his cotton shirt, grasped her forearm and took her across
his lap.

Judge Hines buzzed the microphone again, "Bare backsides!"
Dan's callused hands whisked Sophie's already unbuttoned,
unzipped Arizona jeans partway down her thighs, sweeping
her sky blue panties along too.

Slowly stagnating arena air crept between forty susceptible
bottom cracks.

Forty arms wound up to crack down....

"On your marks, get set, GO!" Judge Hines roared as
spectator flashbulbs popped madly and video cams recorded
the spectacle.

Dan never spanked Sophie at home. She didn't incite taming
of the shrew treatment. But he too possessed a competitor's
heart. Just as he rode in the fair's rodeo gunning for top
honors, he laser-mindedly determined to best this field. He
cupped his hand slightly and rivet-gun whapped Sophie's
beautiful, bouncing globes.

The spankers got precisely two minutes to color their
partners' cheeks. A huge time clock ticked off the seconds
and ear-shatteringly dinged at the halfway mark. Dan dogged
one mound for the first minute and then, not the least
winded, rushed equal burning bloom into the other.

Sophie felt as though a rivet gun *were* attacking her! She
could only death-grip the sturdy chair legs and grit her 
teeth. Finally, she yelled, "YEEEIIIIII," just as the second
"DING" abruptly stifled the cacophony of clapping open
hands. Face instantly matched butt.

Eight poker-faced judges fanned out like ants. Assembly-line
fashion, each aligned tapes bearing a calibrated spectrum
of reds against the crowns of five rubicund rears. They also
took digital photos to short out potential squabbles. The 
spankees covered and straightened up only after the judges
reclaimed their dais.

Deliberations took their own sweet time, so the couples
milled (a little like lost cows, Sophie thought). Dan
anxiously asked her four times if she was all right. Sophie
reassuringly, if absently, patted his arm.

Were her radiating buttocks Grand Champion? Or had deeper
scarlet shone on another lit bottom?

Judge Hines stepped up to declare the winners: Blah, blah,
blah... "...Judy and Will Ruppert!"

Sophie slumped. Inwardly she vowed: "I'll be back!"

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Notes

larrup: to flog or thrash.

Addendum: Sophie consolingly said aloud to Dan, "We'll 
be back." Just wanted readers to know she isn't as
egocentric as the final sentence suggests, LOL.